My brother in law let me drive his brand new VW Golf today. Very nice. The dashboard would not look out of place in Concorde. And everything lights up. Even the footwell. I could look down and make sure that my feet were still attached. And when you press the go pedal it gets faster. This is unlike my existing car. When you press the go pedal in my car the engine convenes a meeting of all relevant components. After a frank and fair exchange of views a vote is taken and, if the majority to accellerate is more than 60% with no more than 10% abstentions, the rev counter is allowed to increase by around 500 rpm.

Not so with the Golf. When you press the go pedal in that something hard kicks you in the small of the back and you notice that the scenery is now going past more quickly. It doesn't get any noisier, rattlier or bouncier (the three ways you can tell that my car is now going downhill) - it just gets faster.

And yet, I still prefer mine. It has that well worn patois, that feeling of familiarity, that lack of footwell lights which seems to fit well with me. And I'm not scared to leave it in carparks. Of course, if I could actually afford a new Golf this might be different.